The Bubble has Burst!

I had a conversation with my brother while we were walking to Davisville station: well, it was more like me just talking and him day dreaming, so it was quite solitary in both respects, yet we were both actively trying to convince the other person that we were involved when really our independent thoughts were what interested us most. Somehow it worked, and no feelings were hurt.

I was thinking about how the idea of being an artist, and expressing yourself is so sensationalized and idolized at unnecessary rates. Especially for the type of environment the people I know have come from. Of course, if you come from an educated family, and are given a huge emphasis on education, and are provided with sufficient support with regards to food and shelter that you will have some extra alone time on your hands, and unless you have the brain capacity of a button, you might think once and a while. These thoughts might not make sense within the tight walls of your brain, so you might decide to write about them, after years of practice they form into stories, songs, poems, monologues, self portraits, and sculptures, it is clear that people of this environment are raised to have the time to express themselves, and yet we venerate it when some one says "I'm taking time to write" well good for you, you've had time you're whole life. NOW I'm not saying there isn't something selfless in this act, because after all, I do believe we give a little part of ourself to every piece we create, but it really says a lot about this extreme admiration that (me included) people of this environment have been extremely sheltered. What really amazes me (and this has been from people I have met through Revolve, and also through random encounters) is that, amidst moving to another country, surviving on your own in come which is not too generous, and learning a new language, an invidual finds the energy and brain capacity (which might almost be full emotionally anyways from all of the change) that they still have the extreme generosity and drive to still be creative and share. This is a new quality, and concept I admire so profoundly, that I am beginning to re-evaluate what inspires me to create.

I've learned that I can no longer feel superior, or different for writing, or doing things creative, it's what I've been raised to do, but instead of using it as vast inner monologues and self reflection to now look into other people's lives for inspiration: I'm definately going through a transition phase with regards to what inspires me, prior to the passed couple of months there were many new feelings, and experiences in my life that I could draw from as 'inspiring' but now I realize that there are many more universal ones outside of me that I must explore in order to connect outside of my tiny bubble. It's a beautiful one, don't get me wrong, but change is absolutely necessary.